I’ve been fighting a lot lately. Fighting internal battles that will remain silent to most people, but continue to be deafening to me today. I was masking panic attacks, mental breakdowns, a racing heart and constant tears every hour of every day. I was exhausted.
But apparently, when presented with fight or flight situations, I fight. I sought professional help through therapy. Opened up to friends and received an outpouring of support. And most importantly, I stood strongly on my own two feet, set the strongest boundaries I’ve ever built and defended myself, my happiness, my safety, my sanity and my heart.
I’m still healing from the deep, permanent scars that the past few months have left on me. And I’m still desperately trying to forgive myself for the mistakes I made while trying to distract myself from these wounds. But I’m moving forward. Continuing to fight a smaller, quieter fight within my own self. There may be tears in my eyes during this first step, but I still walk with my chin held high - proud of myself. But more importantly, patient with myself.
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