.... Corona. Obviously. But I have a few more things in mind.
This year was was full of paranoia, confusion, turmoil, frustration, defeat and isolation. Definitely not what we were expecting. I spent a lot of time letting these negative things absolutely consume me. I mean, it was impossible not to.
But eventually, I realized that this hell of a year could actually be a huge blessing. It was a chance for me to put things on pause, reflect on the not-so-great parts of my life and reevaluate everything. It was a chance for me to look at my past traumas and tell myself that they didn't need to define my life. And finally, it was a chance for me to release all of these awful things and (finally) feel at peace in my own mind. Wow, that was cheesy as hell. But I mean it!
And I'm starting to realize that a lot of other people had similar realizations this year. So let's talk about them and let them go! Here is everything that I have decided to leave in 2020.
Destination happiness. This one is going to be hard to break because I've unknowingly doing it for about 20 years. When I was a kid, I used to print out pictures of big cities, tape them on my wall & say "once I get out of my hometown & move there, I'll be happy!" Don't get me wrong, I think setting goals & manifesting is great. But growing up, I thought that leaving home and moving to a beautiful city was going to solve all my problems. Unfortunately, I'm still guilty of doing that today. So instead, I'm learning to be more present and grounded. In 2021, I'll continue to set big goals while also remaining grateful for what's already in front of me.
Blinded by rose-colored glasses. If you're reading this, you probably know me pretty well. So you know that I'm a glass-half-full kinda girl and that I try to see the best in every situation, relationship or opportunity. But because of that, I tend to play down or completely ignore any red flags (wow lot of metaphors in this one, yikes). I also ignore the fact that a potential job isn't quite right because "at least I got an interview!" Or I stick around a toxic friendship or relationship because "well, I love them & I'm loyal to them!" Whatever the case may be, my rose-colored glasses have an overwhelmingly strong prescription. In the new year, I vow to remain optimistic and hopeful but I'm gonna take my head out of the clouds for a bit (last metaphor, I promise).
Blurry boundaries. I will always be the person who goes out of her way to show her family and friends that she loves them. And I will always be the "go with the flow" girl who says, "I don't care, whatever works for you, I'm down for whatever!" while making plans. I think this proves that I'm a flexible person who makes the most out of any situation. However, this wishy-washy-ness makes it easy for people to take advantage of me which, in turn, makes me feel unloved and under-valued. My therapist reminded me how crucial it is to set up boundaries in each relationship to avoid these crappy feelings and make the relationship even stronger. So, that's what I'm gonna do!
Harsh judgement. This year brought us unexpected sickness, job loss and mental health issues amongst other things. I think this is a gentle reminder that everyone is fighting a battle that you may not know about. So let's be more patient and courteous in the new year.
Being too hard on myself. Well, we're not going to be hard on ourselves either. I'm guilty of using an unhealthy inner-monologue and being way too hard on myself. I didn't realize how bad it was until the world around me pretty much shut down and I was left alone with my own thoughts. I vow to be kinder and more patient with myself in the new year. This may be the hardest New Year's resolution I've ever made, but it's definitely the most important one.
Guys, this year was weird as hell! At one point, we were all collectively on our couches in our baggiest clothes yelling at our TV because a woman fed her husband to a pack of tigers. No one in their wildest dreams could have predicted that happening. This year was a perfect reminder that we shouldn't take life too seriously because a lot of things are completely out of our control. It was also a friendly reminder to be patient with yourself and roll with all the (weird) punches that life may throw your way.
Here's to 2021!
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